Here is our Adoption Journey so far…
We are adopting River (age 8 and her little sister, Sadie (age 6) from Liberia, Africa.
These 2 precious kids will complete our family of 7.
We chose Liberia because we are impressed by Liberia’s resilience and progress as a war torn country that is healing from so much. Liberia works hard to allow adoptions when necessary and to reunite families whenever possible. We are grateful Liberia is allowing us to adopt our daughters, and hopeful as we watch Liberia grow as a country.
We started this journey in April of 2022.
In May of 2023, with the help of our friends and family, church, community, and organizations like Noonday Collection, Phill the Box, Funds2Orgs, and Adopt Together, we reached our fundraising goals to make our adoption possible. At that time, we anticipated our Liberian daughters would be joining our family in 3-6 months time.
We did not get any solid updates for months, until November of 2023, when adoptions for multiple agencies, including our agency, were suspended in Liberia.
There are multiple political conflicts that brought adoptions to a halt in November of 2023. Although these political conflicts put Liberian children at risk, the layers of the conflicts are multifaceted and complicated beyond the adoption process itself.
At this time, there are no adoptions (domestic or international) progressing in Liberian until these political conflicts are resolved. This was a decision made by Liberian governmental leadership.
In February of 2024, we decided to travel to Liberia as a family and do some real-time fact finding on what barriers prevent our family from being together.
We have met with multiple Liberian government officials and multiple individuals who play a role in working in adoptions here. We have spoken with multiple US congressional offices, and have reached out to anyone in the adoption realm that can give insight and advice in a way forward for our children. We continue to hope the US embassy in Liberia will assist us, but have not been able to get a meeting with them to discuss our concerns.
We have visited our children’s orphanage multiple times a week. We have done multiple fundraisers to keep the doors of our daughters’ orphanage open, keep the children’s needs met, and support the staff that cares for them. We have physically done all we can to assist the orphanage in maintaining quality, safety and health for the children. We have discussed our case with experts near and far.
We have been in Liberia for over 3 months, and are sadly running out of funds to remain here.
We fear if we leave, our encouragement and our persistence to represent American families will be lost with our departure. We fear if we leave, the support we have recruited for the kids here will fade. We fear if we leave, the Liberian government will be less motivated to remember our children’s case.
Thanks to each of you and the words of encouragement, financial donations, textile donations and actions of noonday purchasing power to move mountains this past year. We hope you will help us push one more mountain of money out of our way to complete our family.
We continue to humbly ask for any assistance that can be found to support our family in this quest for safety for more than just our 2 Liberian daughters, but a quest to provide a safe way home for them and their peers that wait in orphanages in Liberia.
Day 244. Adopt from Liberia. Missing her birthday and Giving Tuesday.
November 28, 2022Adopt100more
I’m not sure how this post is going to go. It needs to serve as an update on our adoption. It needs to provide an opportunity for giving Tuesday to benefit my 2 children, currently in the process of rescue from orphanism. It needs to be an outlet for me to ask for encouragement and assistance on what to do about the fosters, without telling anyone what we know about the fosters. Lastly, it needs to serve as my anchor to the belief that miracles don’t look like miracles, until the end. Before they reach “miracle status” they are impossible.
We have this unexpected delay because I think God is moving somewhere else.
My friend and pastor, Paul Irminger, did a great job on Sunday delivering a message about time leading up to the “miracle” of the birth of John the Baptist. The time spent by Zechariah in silence because he asked for extra assurances. The extra time after John’s birth that Zechariah stayed mute, until the official ceremonial naming of John.
As a side note, it’s interesting to be friends with your pastor and his family. Like real friends who are also neighbors that can see my driveway at any time and frequent my house without me needing to pick up anything or worry about judgement. If you ever want to try a church with a leader that has zero judgment and 100% truth with a place at his table for anyone who wants an invitation, let me know and I can introduce you.
One thing that I keep coming back to is “How To” spend more time in the presence of God as the miracle of these adoptions unfold as the tragedy of the fosters perpetuates alongside us. That’s the thing I took away from the sermon this week about Zechariah and his need for assurance.
We have this unexpected delay because I think God is moving somewhere else.
When the miracle occurs, this will all make sense.
The reason to spend time in the presence of God, is to prepare for the miracle so we can receive it and use it in the way it was designed.
I just don’t want to work on the wrong thing and miss the miracle. And I often forget the impossibility that must be endured before an event can reach miracle status.
Missing Sadie’s birthday.
I focused on 12/1 in our adoption fundraising to get everyone excited. I did not lie. It was possible to get there, it just wasn’t likely. So why not ask for it? It is hard for me to not have my feet on Liberian soil for my youngest daughter’s 5th birthday.
I confess I used it to help our fundraising. I just didn’t want money to be the reason we could not go. It is part of my personality type, I guess. I have the same personality type as Donald Trump. And if you know me, and you think about it for a sec, you’re laughing a little right now. ESTP. Me and the commonalities I have with Donald, are analyzing our next move…a bit defeated…
We have this unexpected delay because I think God is moving somewhere else.
I used the “Donald” in me to sell an idea, and prayed for God to bless it. And He did.
To date, we have found $56,987.69 to put towards our adoption. That money came from everywhere, but especially from Jeremy. I married Jeremy for lots of reasons. Most of the best reasons I am grateful for that decision is stuff I discovered after I married him. One big one was when he quit his job for his daughters.
We have this unexpected delay because I think God is moving somewhere else.
Jeremy quit his job for 3 reasons.
1. Our daughters both here and overseas needed more of him during this time in their childhood.
2. We could cash out his retirement and call it “early retirement” and donate that chunk to our adoption, saving us 6 months of time.
3. He did not enjoy his job, and unless we are starving, why do something you aren’t called to do? Even if you are really good at it, no reason to be trapped.
Thankful for Jeremy’s heart.
We have this unexpected delay that is actually more consistent with what was our realistic expected timeline. The “Donald Trump” in me is indignant the stars did not align to match our effort, the effort of the village of support that is waiting to see the miracle.
We have this unexpected delay because I think God is moving somewhere else.
Thomas Edison was an inventor that never quit. (Also ESTP personality type like me). Although the genius behind his mind is one that is nothing like me, the ability to change gears and look at things a different way to still make it work, maybe even make it better… and to keep…. …..going.
So in the meantime of waiting for our Liberian daughters to come home, and surrendering my barely realistic game of fundraising just to see if we could do it, I’m now forced to turn more inward.
We have this unexpected delay because I think God is moving somewhere else.
Realistic international adoptions take 2-4 years.
Miracle international adoptions take 12-18 months.
We are in our 7th month of pursuing adoption from Liberia in general. We are in our 4th month of pursuing the specific adoption of River and Sadie.
I am so glad Sadie’s birthday is still on the minds and hearts of so many of you and so many of your children, as it comes up in conversation with me a lot. She will need that when she gets here. She has no idea when her birthday is. Thank you for celebrating with me when I could not celebrate with her.
We have this unexpected delay because I think God is moving somewhere else.
We are in our 22nd month of choosing to love in perpetuity two little fosters, and the open agreement between us and those girls that we are always here. From the first day you crossed our doorstep, until the last day you take a breath, our family is your family. In all the perpetuity that can be found as equal as any of our daughters, we hold space in our heart and our house, for you.
As I feel the need to sort of “go dark” to try to reason out how to get God’s assurances again, I won’t give in to that part of my human heart today.
We will miss Sadie’s 5th birthday. I used her birthday as a way to market their adoption and all adoptions. Thank you for investing in our ideas.
I am as available and obedient to God as I can find ways to be. And in that availability and that obedience, I am so angry and frustrated about the things I can see combined with the things I can’t see.
The mother in me and the humanity in me values time so much. 6 months is too long. So as I lay down my anger and wipe my tears and find a way to “get up” after learning all the things I learned about all of my displaced daughters over the last 3 weeks, I will stop gritting my teeth and silent my screaming heart that nothing makes sense. I will gratefully hug the ones I can reach, and try to be assured that this extra time is not a weapon formed against me, but a tool God has a miracle planned for. As I walk through empty bedrooms in my house and am aware of the uselessness they seem to have, I will wait with a heart of gratitude and I will choose peace, even when earthly peace cannot be found.
Because I know God is listening. I know He is moving on the behalf of these children. I know He is working. I know He is speaking to me. The same way He knew my little house in Tennessee haunted me with empty bedrooms 10 years ago, as I sat in silence, waiting, for just one baby. We got 2 at a time and then an extra one right after that. I needed every inch of that house.
The last reason I need this blog is to respond to God in a public and obedient way that although God knows my heart and my frustration and my impatience, I will again choose to set those things aside and agree with this one assurance I firmly believe.
We have this unexpected delay because I think God is moving somewhere else.
And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8:38-39
Speak for the speechless. Day 224. Adopt from Liberia. World Adoption Day is tomorrow.
November 8, 2022Adopt100more
This adoption brings me to my knees every day. Often leaves me speechless. But I can’t be speechless, because my voice is their voice. And they can’t be heard without adults like me, connecting with adults like you.
BE NICE.
Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;ensure justice for those being crushed. Psalm 31:8
Trying to find a way to connect in the right way at the right time without disrupting other important things, but finding more desperate need every day is an endless puzzle.
Be nice.
I keep telling myself to be nice. Be nice to people that might help you. Be a source of encouragement and inspire with positivity and don’t scare anyone off.
Be nice.
So how do I be nice about female circumcision most commonly done in 3-5 year old little girls all over Africa?
How do I find a way to be nice when orphans are placed because there is no food and no resources but somehow caregivers found a way to do that.
It’s cultural. It’s a legacy lie and now a legacy sin. It’s a lie from the pits of hell so outlandish, and yet such a deeply held belief that this “rite of mutilation” is firmly held as necessary. The legacy lie states they will somehow be able to be good wives and good mothers and faithful to their spouses because removing an organ part of the sexual reproductive system will cure an “insatiable need for sex” that somehow will destroy their families for generations to come.
Goodness.
BE NICE.
Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;ensure justice for those being crushed. Psalm 31:8
Makes me sad. Removing a child’s clitoris does not make enjoying sex impossible. It will destroy everything else about trust and safety and peace they held dear before a caregiver went down that road of mutilation and abuse.
I read yesterday that usually a grandmother performs the ritual.
Be nice.
BE NICE.
Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;ensure justice for those being crushed. Psalm 31:8
Also, as a side note, there are lots of fundraisers out there to help survivors of this mutilation find healing and peace. Surgical repair is available. But reconstructive surgery is expensive.
Be nice.
BE NICE.
Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;ensure justice for those being crushed. Psalm 31:8
Kids are starving and getting mutilated and living in war torn countries sick from simply preventable and treatable diseases.
Millions need families.
The sooner my daughters exit Liberia, the sooner they get to fully embrace safety and peace.
I wonder if they fear me. Fear that I will blindfold them, take a knife to their most neurologically sensitive areas, and then brand them on their back with scars to sign my work?
How many nights will pass before they ask one of my other children if that’s what happens here? And brace themselves for the possibility?
Be nice.
BE NICE.
Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;ensure justice for those being crushed. Psalm 31:8
It’s tough. Tough to be nice. Tough to get off my knees after the wind was knocked out of me when I found out this happens to 1/2 the girls in Africa before they turn 5.
In honor of world adoption day and all the excitement that occurs with celebrating the massive world networking supported by our generation’s leadership in those founders for Adopttogether, Noonday, Give send go, Small World Adoption Agency, Phill the box, Funds2orgs and so many others, I am proud to stand with you as we rewrite the possibilities of orphans and push our way in to educate all matriarchs that this legacy lie stops here. We do not cut them. We do not starve them. We do not sell them. We do not buy them. We do not file down their teeth so they are easier to sell and can’t fight back.
Kids are important. People are good.
Yesterday, I was speechless as I learned the gravity of female circumcision for 5 year old girls. Took my breath, stole my words, knocked me down, and stole my “nice”.
Today, I can’t wait to get my feet on Liberian soil and find a grandmother to befriend, and educate. With an anatomy book and a hug and the truth. I will be nice.
Clock is ticking for you to help us get their faster. Pray the Liberian government take 3 days to sign off on our Dossier. Pray we get a court date in December. Pray we get the money to go soon. Pray I find the strength to BE NICE, because that’s the only way to fix a lie. The truth, in a way that it can be received in the spirit it is meant to be received. So that change happens and healing begins.
BE NICE.
Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;ensure justice for those being crushed. Psalm 31:8
Ways you can help:
Click here to help with our adoption
https://adopt100morehappykids.wordpress.com/2022/11/07/ways-to-help-with-our-adoption/
Halloween is such a kid holiday at our house. I love it. We have collections of costumes and we have costume movie night (dress up in our favorite Halloween costumes from years past and watch a movie). Last year, we had 5 kids on Halloween. The fosters were here and we had a blast. We miss them. We hope they are doing well. We pray for an update. We wish the child welfare system was better.
Last year at this time, River and Sadie were still with their birth family. We have paperwork that tells their story and has a timeline of events that sums up their short lives so far.
They entered the children’s home owned by Small World Adoption Agency on 11/1/2021.
So, on 10/31/2021, they spent their last night with their bio family. They were not in good health and the additional children in their family of origin were there, too. The choice to place River and Sadie in the children’s home and pray for an adoptive family to choose them was not an easy one. It was one made to save the lives of their cousins as well. Just not enough food to go around and not enough adults to care for them, and never enough jobs to go around.
We have 30 days left until Sadie turns 5. I don’t think she knows her birthday. Most kids in Liberia don’t know, from what we have heard. My newest Liberian friend just celebrated his 8th birthday. He was so apprehensive the day before he kept trying to give his “birthday” away to his new adoptive siblings. But, when he finally experienced his first birthday party, he had a great time.
Not sure how to explain the loss I feel for him to get his first birthday acknowledgment at age 8.
I guess I should be glad he made it 7 years in Liberia. Statistically, that’s an unlikely accomplishment all by itself.
So as we prepare to trick or treat and laugh and eat candy, it does make me miss River and Sadie today, and I miss the fosters every day, but more on big days I had such great memories with them. Kid milestone memories are important.
As we all think back to age 8, and all that went down in our lives as kids that year, I am thankful that the kids under my roof tonight are already having a blast. I am hopeful that River and Sadie will be here soon, to start their milestone memories the American way, while never forgetting and cherishing those that helped with their survival up to this point of adoption.
Birthday parties are secondary when kids are dying from starvation and illness and violence. I am proud of Liberia’s progress and hopeful for their future.
We have become noonday ambassadors to sell handmade items from artisans all over the world and support ethical free trade and fund our adoption costs simultaneously.
https://bit.ly/Smith-adoption Click to shop now!
We are collecting all textiles to fundraise for our adoption. We get $0.20/pound. Materials go both here and overseas to give a hand up to those in need asking for jobs and materials.
Call, text, email, pm us and we will schedule pickups
We are collecting name brand empty ink cartridges and toner cartridges to recycle and are paid by the empty cartridges.
Call, text, email, pm us and we will schedule pickups.
We have bonfire merchandise for sale designed by our kids:
https://www.bonfire.com/store/merchandise-to-adopt-2-liberian-daughters/
Thank you for helping. Thank you for reading. Thank you for being good.
I want my kids on the same continent. We are getting close. The end is the hardest part. It becomes overwhelming and scary and exciting and exhausting. And as everything seems to be going “right”, everything feels so out of control. Reminds me of labor with Little. I chose natural childbirth with Little. She is now 6. Natural childbirth is a personal choice. Not right or wrong at all, just an option some choose. I guess for others it can happen so fast, it’s not really a “choice”. For me, it was a choice. And as those last few moments occurred, I remember them clearer than I remember anything else.
My doctor said I was at “4” and she was going to go home and take a shower and come back and be with me all night if that’s what we needed. We had been at this for several hours already. It was 4:30pm. My 2 dear friends were with me, and one also went home to check on her kids and get ready for a long night of labor. The other told Jeremy to try to take a nap and she sat with me and held my hand and continued to reassure me I was doing good, and that everything is going beautifully.
Then there was that moment of panic. That moment of me feeling like I was staring down this long dark corridor of apprehensive unknowns. I did childbirth before, but not naturally. I’m not a panicky person. But I had a moment of panic. I pushed it back, prayed for God to just be present and protect “Little” through this next part. The part in me that needed to heal. The part in me that needed to learn I could trust and depend on Jeremy, too. The part in my heart that needed to know that although I may feel alone in that dark corridor of apprehensive unknown, alone is a choice. I asked for everyone to wake up and everyone to come back. I told my dear friend, Devon, to wake Jeremy up because I can’t do this next part without him. So Devon listened and left Jeremy and I alone in our delivery room as he reassured me he knew what to do if this baby showed up before everyone else made it back. We are good, he said. You are doing great. It’s fine. Everything is fine. We get to meet our next daughter soon.
This calm surrender and confidence washed over me. “Little” was born just 18 minutes later. My doctor barely had on gloves as she ran to deliver my daughter.
Since then, I’ve been different. I’ve been healed from things I may never fully understand. One thing, I am not alone unless I choose to be. God is there. He sends extra people, too. He just waits for us to choose.
Thanks for helping. Thanks for not making me do this last part of “delivery” of these 2 sweet girls alone.
People are good, with good intentions. Keep…. …..going
We just got our approval letter for our I 600A fo in the mail! This means the US embassy approves of us adopting River (age 6) and Sadie (age 4) from Liberia. We thought this would take 3-5 weeks from fingerprinting, but it only took 1 week!
Next step is to send our Dossier (fancy French word for info) to Liberia and let their government officially approve us to adopt these 2 specific kiddos.
This could take 1 week or 4 months. We have no way of knowing.
After that process completes, we get a court date in Liberia to appear and complete their adoption.
The Adoption Process is like moving the biggest Rock I’ve ever seen. Our adoption process is becoming the Rock that Floats.
Our adoption of these 2 little girls used to be the immovable Big Rock. It grew to a big rolling Rock with tons of momentum. Now it is about to float.
Click here to see our “Adoption Rock” start to float.
https://adopttogether.herokuapp.com/families/the-smith-s
FBI fingerprinting is a big milestone in our timeline to get our feet on Liberian soil. On average, we will wait 30-45 days from today to get a letter (I-600A approval) from the USCIS (immigration for the United States) that gives us permission to adopt internationally from Liberia. After that approval, we send our documentation to Liberia (it’s ready to go except the I600A approval letter.)
Then we wait again. During the next wait, Liberian government officials investigate the history of our Liberian daughters’ lives. They will talk to their mother, their aunt, the staff at Small World Children’s Home and any other adult or professional entity they deem appropriate for verifying that adoption to the United States is the last resort for their survival. Their mother is alive and is reportedly supportive of their adoption and relieved they have a family waiting.
Click here to see our “Adoption Rock” start to float.
https://adopttogether.herokuapp.com/families/the-smith-s
We will get the chance to meet their birth family in Liberia, as their mother will be required to be present in court to sign for their adoption. We hope to establish a relationship with her, so she can check in on the girls and so we can check in on her.
We have decided to become Noonday ambassadors. We are inspired by Noonday and the fair trade marketplace created by Noonday. We plan to use our profits to fund our own adoption, then use it to fund adoptions for other families. Noonday creates a fair trade world market for artisans all over the world to have dignified jobs. Human and child sex trafficking is a problem worldwide. We want a chance to combat slavery of this nature by providing jobs to those being rescued from traffickers all over the world. Noonday does that. Noonday supports adoption with every purchase. We love that, too! Our generation has found a way to make the global market an equal playing field for those wanting an honest day’s work that results in ways families can thrive, no matter where they were born, or what has happened to them.
I am not a jewelry person. I wear my wedding rings and my Keep…. ….going bracelet and my watch.
Now, I wear my bullet necklace.
Click here to see our “Adoption Rock” start to float.
https://adopttogether.herokuapp.com/families/the-smith-s
My bullet necklace was made from used bullets and artillery found in fields of Africa from violent conflicts of the past. They are melted down and made into jewelry like my bullet necklace. It cost me $42. The journey of the bullets I wear around my neck are ones that I wear in memory of the loss of life. That loss of life created an instability in the foundation of the fields they fell in. Those same bullets now build a bridge between my throat and the hands that assembled the necklace. May we learn to stop using our bare hands to attack the throat of our rivals, and learn more about how bullet necklaces forge peace.
https://ivonneliebenberg.noondaycollection.com/shop/moonlight-necklace/
I hope to sell a lot of bullet necklaces. I hope to save a lot of lives with bullets around my neck.
I did 2 separate blogs that I thought of a lot today, and want to reference them again, here.
One is about weather, and after hurricane Ian made his mess, weather forecasts takes on new gravity for me.
https://adopt100morehappykids.wordpress.com/2022/08/24/day-148-adopt-from-liberia-weather/
Statistics are helpful for me to quantify a need for resources. Statistics also help tell stories without violating the privacy of those children, especially before they are ready to tell their story on their terms.
Statistics I know well are those involving child sex trafficking in southwest Florida. I will not revisit those statistics at this moment, but just know that any hurricane increases the number of victims within the child sex trafficking industry. Fosters are trafficked. They are trafficked a lot. Some of us thought we had abolished slavery, but we remain wrong. I know, I’m sad too. Sad or not, if we don’t start talking about it more, exposing it more, punishing it more and allowing it less, we will regret it. Knowledge is power. When you are ready to be a part of the solution for child sex trafficking, just do a quick google search involving human trafficking and the Polaris project. At minimum, consider buying a bullet necklace from me to give jobs to those exiting trafficking on the other side of the earth.
Click the next link to buy a necklace that helps our adoption and gives a job to former sex trafficking slaves.
https://ivonneliebenberg.noondaycollection.com/onlinetrunkshow/?cl=151221D6-CB1E-44CB-A4ED-3B5042599288
The 2nd blog is the one about our passports and can be found here:
https://adopt100morehappykids.wordpress.com/2022/09/09/passports-im-not-a-saint-day-162-adopt-from-liberia/
I have started comparing our adoption process to a big rock that is rolling down a dirt road, pushed by 100 different hands, all helping move us closer to our Liberian daughters. If you would like to help float the big rock across the ocean, a $5 donation makes a huge difference to the relentless heart of mine that could care less about the exhaustion of my soul on days like today.
Click the next link to give $5.
Click here to see our “Adoption Rock” start to float.
https://adopttogether.herokuapp.com/families/the-smith-s
The freedom to adopt a child from Liberia is one I was born with. Because I’m an American, some things are open for me, as granted by my birth on American soil. That freedom is sacred to me. The ability to complete an adoption is one we work for. Daily we work. We work to protect it, work to pay for it, work to maintain our status as “stable” and work to maintain the network of support that is mostly the readers of this blog to keep our big “rock of adoption dreams” rolling down a dirt road to reach our kids. Pretty soon our “rock of adoption dreams” will float across the Atlantic Ocean and back.
https://adopttogether.herokuapp.com/families/the-smith-s
The thing we have power over for this adoption is asking for help, and moving the mountain of money it takes to adopt 2 littles from Africa. We asked everyone. We brought every effort we had and borrowed effort from everyone willing to share and used every skill set we possess and then borrowed or developed more skill sets. We prayed every day, and honestly, after 3 years in the foster care world as a parent, my prayers are often angry. Possibly consistently angry, but consistently persistent as well.
Then the support showed up, and still shows up every day. Every day, you are here in some form. Every day, someone helps. Every day someone does something unexpected. Whether it is clothes and textile donations, or noonday purchases or ink cartridges or cash or just a question to see how we are doing, help shows up every day.
We still need around $16,000 to float across the Atlantic Ocean and back. Seems like such a small number, knowing we needed $71,100.00 just 202 days ago.
Thanks for helping. Thanks for listening. Thanks for supporting the rock of adoption dreams that should sink, but instead floats.
Click here to see our “Adoption Rock” start to float.
https://adopttogether.herokuapp.com/families/the-smith-s
Keep…. …..going.
